help, me, kinda?

[peram]

First of all, I only want Geo, Strawberry, Smashbro, and Dobs to reply in this, if its not too much to ask.
Geo, I has lotsa problems. Emotions suck. I dont' want them.
Ok. I don't even know where to begin.
I hate 2 of my friends because of my friendgirl.
They're friends with her also, and it seems like they're kinda stealing her away from me.
Me telling her I like her last month didn't exactly help either.
I just want to tell those 2 of my friends to stay away from her, but I know I can't do that and i hate it!

I also kinda hate one of those friends for another reason.
I have no clue why, but I still kinda have feelings for my ex (very miniscule)
And every time my friend mentions her name, I start to feel sad again. And recently that's been a lot.
I also hate a different friend of mine for the same reason.
I just want to say F you all to my friends, but that would simply make things worse and I don't have a good enough reason to do so in the first place. And sometimes when I'm around my friendgirl, or just talking to her on myspace, I start to feel sad. I never should have told her I like her. That's the thing. Ever since that night a month ago, she hasn't treated me the same. And around my friend Shelby, I feel sad sometimes, and I have NO clue why!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can only talk to 1, maybe 2 or 3 of my friends about this stuff. The rest won't care, or they'll turn it into a joke. Neither of those friends are guys. In fact, almost any guy that is a friend of mine, I hate. I just realized that.
Around my friend Alexandra, I also feel sad sometimes. And even though I don't know her incredibly well, and I don't always talk to her, I trust her. She's one of those few friends actually.
I refuse to talk to any of my friends (except for those 2 people) about my problems from now on, because they never come to me with theirs. They have other friends for that, so I say f**k that. I need new friends. I dont' know how to just leave my old friends though. Its not that simple.
My whole life is screwed up right now, and although I know it'll probably end up getting better eventually, it feels like it never will.

[Dobs]

ok, the two friends stealing friendgirl away are girls or guys? if theyre guys i could see it making you angrier. I think you should maybe plan out something where the four of you hang out, i dont know but i think it could break up the tension a bit. If you notice them leaving you out and stuff, then you can confront them on why. Or you could just confront them now and save yourself some time and a possibly akward situation. thats up to you.

as far as your a-hole guy friends go, ive said it before and ill say it again, dont bother with them. If people dont make you happy, there is no point in having them around. The EXACT same thing happened to me 2 years ago, i found myself hating all my friends, they were mean to me, played jokes on me, and were just all around bad people. so i basically ditched them and found some new ones that i ACTUALLY LIKE. I know its really hard to do (i had been telling myself i would do it 6 months beforehand but couldnt) but once you do, youll feel SOOOO much better about yourself.

having 1 or 2 good friends you can talk to is fine. Thats all you really need... ive really got only 2 people i can talk about my problems with and it works out fine for me. You really only need one person to talk to.

thats all Dobs has as far as words of wisdom go... good luck dude, it WILL get better i swear on my third unborn child

[peram]

guys, and I don't really hang out with one of them.
There's no way I would want to get them together so that they can steal friendgirl away even more
and all is not well with me and friendgirl. She still barely talks to me. That's how it's been. I already know that I WILL soon lose her as a friend

Dobs, I can't just say screw you guys and then walk away from them. It's not that easy.
They'll follow me, and ask me questions like "wtf dude? why'd you do that?" and when asked that question, I can't think of reasons, no matter how well I plan it out before hand, so then I'll find myself apologizing and being with them again. And if I did that, I'd feel bad, and it would add to the bad feelings, making myself more miserable.

I hate everything about my life right now.
Dobs, give me a time machine, PLEASE

[Dobs]

yea, i didnt think that it was the best idea shortly after posting it... but you went to friendgirls house the other day right? it wasn't akward right? id say that thats a sign that things are getting at least a litttle better. As for the 2 anoying guys, just avoid them a little, i thought about it and confronting them would be a bad idea...two of them...one of you. Try to steal HER away from THEM, it should help

As for the stupid friends issue, you cant just cut them out immedietly. Just gradually talk to them less and less, dont return their calls, and if you sit with them at lunch, the final step is to sit with someone else. If they ask you about it (which they will, i know) don't sound angry. Sounding angry kills whatever argument you had. Just calmly tell them that its nothing against them (even though it is) but your just happier sitting with *insert new friends names here* They will likley respect your decision. After moving, stay in contact with your old friends, very minimally, take some time before drifting out of their lives completley.

id give it to you but my time machine is broken right now, it ate some bad eggs and has a severe case of the runs

[peram]

yeah, I went to her house. But it WAS awkward. I sat on her couch and watched her brother play Xbox for like the first 15 minutes until finally the brother let me play. I realize now, that I didn't really speak to her all that much. I think the only reason she invited me over was because everyone else in the world was busy.

As for the 2 guys, one of them is like my best friend, except now I kinda hate him. I'm going to stop talking to the 2 of them gradually, and there's no way in hell I can steal her from them. if it was possible, I wouldn't be second to last on her top friends on myspace, and she'd actually talk to me more, instead of just saying ok, all right, cool, and stuff like that. I get no conversation out of her and it's making me really sad

fix it dammit!

my first step in ditching one of my friends will be "dude, please just don't talk to me today, I'm really not in a good mood and I don't want to talk about it"

[Dobs]

ok, the only way to kill the akward turtle is to throw it off a building, take the elevator down, then back over it with your car repeatedly until its a pile of mush. Basically, being forced into contact with someone and forcing yourself to have conversation is the only way to make akward leave. Ask her to hang out with you one day, take her somewhere, liek to the mall or something so that thres a lot of walking and talking time. Just dont think about what your saying that much, and you should be fine.

if one of these guys is your best friend i dont think you should stop talking to him over this, you should talk to him about it. As for the other one, cut him out, he desrves it.

as for the last thing. You dont havve to actually say something to them, its actually best not to say anything. Just become as painfully boring as possible around them. That way when you leave, they wont care quite as much as if you actually said something. Thats how i did it, i just put my ipod on and tuned them out...A LOT.

[peram]

Dobs, there was plenty of talking time yesterday.
And she probably would say no to going to the mall.
So no, it's not going to be fine!

nah, I realized he's the kind of person that isn't really my friend. I'm getting rid of like all of my friends.
But none of them really treat me like a friend should anyways.

I know how I'm gonna do it.
For the friends at lunch, I'm just going to pretend to do my homework a lot. Eventually I'll find someone else to sit with.

trust me, I know how to get rid of friends.

[Dobs]

good at least THAT issue is out of the way.

now for friendgirl... if you think she would say no to going NOW, just wait. Although you say that she hasn't been talking to you much keep talking to her. Just try with all the pwer in holy heaven to make the akward go away. Once it does, (which it will, dont tell me its not) THEN start asking her to hang out and stuff again.

[strawberry]

Be careful not to become an outcast though!! That's even more painful, and then your friendgirl would prolly like you less.
And please, whatever you do, DON'T act rashly.
Does it seem like they're stealing her away from you or are they? Be sure on that.
Did you tell her you like her as in a friend or as a girlfriend?
What do you mean by she hasn't treated you the same?
Like being uber nicer to you? Or awkward?

[peram]

Dobs! I don't feel the awkwardness.
I just don't think she wants to be my friend anymore really, and the only reason why she talks to me a little bit is so that I don't think she hates me. or something.

I really don't think anything will get better. It's been a long time dobs.

strawberry said:

Be careful not to become an outcast though!! That's even more painful, and then your friendgirl would prolly like you less.
And please, whatever you do, DON'T act rashly.
Does it seem like they're stealing her away from you or are they? Be sure on that.
Did you tell her you like her as in a friend or as a girlfriend?
What do you mean by she hasn't treated you the same?
Like being uber nicer to you? Or awkward?

I won't be an outcast.
I won't act rashly.
I'm pretty sure they are.
more than friends.
She barely talks to me, won't look at me in the hall

[strawberry]

Okay.... in this situation, don't talk to her too much. Have a period of being away from each other, separation.
But make sure you don't lost her as a friend. That'll give a chance for wounds to mend and words to become a hazy memory. Then talk and joke with her when you think the time is right.
If you keep pushing her, she'll feel more awkward and not know what to do.
Does your friendgirl like willing to being stolen away from you? As in... not putting up a fight, hanging with them more, etc.
I have to play the violin now =/
But reply and I'll check this later!

[peram]

That already happened.
IT'S GOING TO HAPPEN! I ALREADY KNOW IT!
THE TIME HAS BEEN RIGHT!
I DON'T THINK SHE REALIZES ITS HAPPENING

[Dobs]

Dobs stepping back in for a moment,

if you dont feel the akwardness, GOOD. Now is the time to force your self on her, for lack of a better term. I think the reason she hasn't been talking to you much is because SHE still feels a little akward. the best way to fix that is by hanging out with her more to make her see that you are capable of still being her friend(even if thats not necessarily true). and since you still like her do NOT make another move unless your ABSOLUTLEY SURE she likes you too.

i gotta finish a paper, ill be back on tonight.

[peram]

Ok, let me walk up to her and say, lets hang out more!
That way she thinks I just want to be with her because I like her so I can make even more awkward!

I don't think that's such a good idea.
I give up.
unless you think I should just tell her how I feel about this whole situation
but that wouldn't necessarily be good, would it.

[Naked Snake II]

Okay the Guru Intervenes.
I'll just say this Peram. You should start hanging out with her more. Y?? So she doesn't take you out completely from her "friends not to talk to" to "Never talk to unless for homework". Here's what I would do in the situation your in now:
I would first start off by telling her V
"It's been a while since we last spoke to each other. I can tell you feel akward talking to me now and all, but for the record- I messed up and I completely understand. I had no right to put you in that situation (name of person). Can I just say now that I was an idiot and I'm really sorry as a friend and a person. I understand if you won't talk to me or hang out with me anymore again."

We'll consider that as "The Talk". Keep talking to her when you say that so she gets that your trying to make things right between you guys.

Tell me how it goes