Why I get nervous around certain issues..

[lloydexphere]

I am just going to say it. And yes, I am not going to bring religion into this..
Sour and a few others a while back were messing with me, asking me why I dislike sex topics, and why I dislike talking about gays/certain issues..
It is because of life issues I have had in the past.
You know, it's just one of the many reasons why I am home schooled, but let me explain a few things that has happend...

-Knowing me, I get uncomfortable/shy VERY easily when talking about things such as what I mentioned, so when there are other boys out there who actually follow me and actually DO SOMETHING to me.. it.. it kind of makes me all weak, and I want to just hide. I have gay friends, my girl friend was too. I don't want to judge, but it gets to the point where I have to hide. Let me name off a few things:
-They are attracted to me. Boys are. Why? One said I am overly cute. I am starting to think that is a bad thing.
-Around middle school, I was friends with this one boy, and one time he got me up against the wall. He attempted.. something..
-In high school after football practice, in the locker room, they literally tied me up. And.. did stuff.. It's too much to explain here..

-Yes, I am naive. I never knew what "go jack off" meant until these annoying girls starting .. doing stuff.. which was near the end of 10th grade. I still don't know a lot of things. I want to be clean, and I do not want to know. I have never seen porn, and I really don't want to see any.

-as time went on, I became more nice. Everyone always tells me I am a caring person. On the internet, and in real life, but they take advantage of that. They also take advantage of my stoopidness.
They laugh at me when I don't know a certain something about sex.

-I am a virgin.
-Too many times have someone tried to take it away from me. Enough said.

-Probably worst of all, rape..
-all you peeps may joke about this. IT IS NOT FUNNY. I have been almost fully raped by two girls. Yes. Oh? A good thing? No! Slutty man whores may like it. But struggling out of the varsity locker room is not easy. I am not going to be happy for this. I am glad I got away. Believe me or not. Think I am a weird guy.. I don't care..
-A girl real close to me got raped. And cries all the time/never the same since then. Not very fun, eh? I cry for her and pray for her too.

I hope this thread explains the way I act and feel. Sorry I can't tell you everything that has happen. I really don't want to talk about a lot of it.

[Angel]

The way I have always felt... as long as we all don't make everyone feel bad for how they feel. That's fine..

I myself know there is a time and place for things, and I myself didn't learn about sexual things until a much later age than most too.. to where most people still think I'm adorable when I tell them. :3 Not going to say it here for privacy though.

My sister was raped, so I agree with you that rape is not a joke and I always have had a problem with it used as one.

All around, things are going to be good. Just.. if someone is picking on you, try to ignore it as best you can. Your a great person. ^__^

[lloydexphere]

Thank you Angel. *hugz*

[Dobs]

I'm kind of curious to see exactly what happened in that locker room, and the other situations you were talking about. PM me if you want to talk about stuff, I think I can help.

And rape isn't funny if its serious. But if you're afraid to talk about something in jest, that just builds it up and makes it worse than it is.

[lloydexphere]

Thanks Dobs. I am still uncomfortable to discuss anything more than this thread though, sorry.

I don't know though..

[Roach]

im sorry dude, but i almost got raped b4, it was a BIIIIGGGGG Fight, even though i lost. Never let some1 rape you, EVER, once i felt that finger up my a**, i lost it

[lloydexphere]

ah, sorry to hear..